What i want to do when i grow up. Part:3. (A.K.A. Your Zombie Plan!)

SO what is your zombie plan!?!?!?
What you don't have one! It's almost 2012! And unless you by that crapshoot movie then i bet on the end coming at the hands (And jaws) of the walking undead or infected, depending on who is Directing this universe.

Why? Well think about it, its a better explanation then MOST end of the world movies!

2012: (Will most likely not cover the 200 Million Dollar's is cost to make)
Soler flares heat the earth's core and cause.... wait what? Wouldn't solar flares that strong hitting earth kill everything on the planet before heating the core? And who builds Survival Ships in the Himalaya's?

The Core: (Cost 60 Million, Made 73 Million World Wide)
Earth core spots spinning and sets in motion..... Wait. Again? Really? Unless Gravity STOPS in the universe, the earth's core will keep spinning, just like the rest of the planet.

Volcano: (Cost 90 Million, Made 112 Million World Wide)
A Volcano pop's up in L.A. OK not AS dumb. Until you notice that the San Andreas Fault is not the right kind of fault to make Volcano's just earth quakes That's why California has only the Long Valley Caldera.



So any ways, Zombies are Just as likely as most disaster movies. and MUCH funner!

So most people that have zombie plans. Have bad zombie plans.
Bad idle #1. Corps Icicles.
The idle that zombies will freeze solid in cold weather is a sound one. But try driving there wile the zombies are lose. And even in most parts of Alaska, its not freezing YEAR ROUND! So unless you live there already this is a bad plan.

Bad idle #2. The Fortress.
Build a Fortress and wait of help. Not a totally bad idle, but if you don't build it ahead of time it's going to be lack luster and iffy, and even if you do, who is to say help will come? Or that the military wont start level bombing the zombies around you. And your going to run out of food and ammunition sooner or later.

Bad idle #3. Feeding the Animals.
Many people run off the idle that "I don't need to be faster then the zombies, just faster then my grandmother" Well ya, so you live near a old folks home, but your going to run out of decoys soon. And now the old people are zombies! And you have a collection of zombies near you that know there is food near you!

Bad idle #4. Food / Gun stores.
EVEY one is going to go there, now you have zombies and armed humans to fight!
And most food stores have big open windows! perfect Zombie Doors.

Good idle #1. No man is a zombie Island!
Have a list (Mental or otherwise) of people you would trust in a zombie apocalypse. Go find them as soon as you know what's going on, hopefully wile cellphones still work. No man survives the Zombie attack alone for long.

Good idle #2.
The Short game. Have some kind of weapon and food on hand.
Have a safe place to stay until you team can get to you.

Good idle #3.
A long game. Have a idle of what your going to be doing.
Going to a army base? A island? A Government Facility?
Pick something and stick to it, if it doesn't work pick something else.

Good idle #4.
The end game. Are you going to help? Going for a long team fortress? Counting on help?

What you need to know.
#1 Were do you live?.
Do you live in a major city? or the sticks? One plan can work in one place and not the other.

#2 What is near you?.
Is there a military base near you? A Government Building? Use what you have.




MY ZOMBIE PLAN!

OK so this plan works in ether A:Manchester Ky. Or B:Richmond Ky.
My go to list. (A.K.A.) "The Team"
My Best Friend Chris.
My Hetero Life Mate "Monkey"
Friend: "P.F." aka David.
Adopted Brother: "Jabes"
My sister / brother in law.
My Mother / Father.
My sisters-friend and her husband.
And all connecting personnel.

That is (If all live throw the first wave of attacks) 20ish people.
I'm betting on maybe 1/2 to 1/4th of that. Because both places are lightly populated.

The goods! aka: Short game.
OK so all of the people above being included, we would have.
2 Handguns.
1 Rifle.
1 Hunting Rifle.
1 Shotgun.
And a Truckload of Melee Weapons. (Thanks monkey)
As well as a man who might be able to decapitate a zombie with his bare hands.
As well as vehicles and food.

The Plan. aka: Long game.
OK so i get my people and my goods. I get into a Vehicular object and i head to Monkey's house.
From there i get his boat and head to the Clay's Ferry area of the Kentucky River.
We Put the boat in and head down stream. This does.
#1. The water is your friend, zombies can't swim and its hard to climb into a boat.
#2. We are no heading along a area were we can take other boat's and supply's.
#3. We are not staying still.
#4. The River might have a better controlled area in it. (Aka the coast guard / military)

The end game. aka: The Republic of Willmoria!
OK so we now head down river, to the Mighty Mississippi River! Then South to the gulf of Mexico! Before we hit the coast we take a fishing boat.

After that we head to the Gulf Coast and find a Offshore Oil Rig.
Once there we set up shop.
The rig will give up, power, heat, power, communications and a safe place to raise food and fish from. (using the nets from the boat)

This is a long term plan. We wait until some one sets up a safe area to move back to.
Maybe communicating with other like minded oil rig dwellers.

What i want to do when i grow up. Part:2. (Zombie Hunter)

OK so i went over Hunting Vampires.
Now we are going to go over hunting Zombies. WHY? I mean there are no people that clam to be Zombies. But that being said Zombies SCARE THE CRAP OUT OF ME! On a scale from 1 to 10, One being the least threatening / frightening, 10 being the most.

(Mind you that we are using "Zombie's" For the Walking undead, I will use the term "The Infected" For 28 day latter zombies)

1 Pizza. (Who doesn't like Pizza?)
2 A Fluffy Kitty.
3 A Sweet little old lady. (She would be lower, but she could have a gun)
4 A Sugar crazed five year old.
5 A Sugar crazed ten year old. (If they were normally sized for there age)
6 A Angry Fat Chick. (We are talking Jabba-da-hut, not just chunky)
7 A mugger.
8 A Republican. (Rightard) and or a Infected Zombie.
9 A Vampire.
10 A Bear!
11 A.K.A. "O MY GOD ITS EATING MY LEGS!" = Zombie!



So.
First off i would like to say this.
The "Infected" Are much less impressive to me then Zombies.
Infected are just diseased angry humans, that can infect others. So basiclly contagious methheads. (A.K.A. New Yorkers)

Zombies are the walking undead! They don't need sleep, food, entertainment, shooting them can be largely fruitless, and there will be ALLOT of them.

So.

#1. how to tell if some one is a zombie.
Part 1; The Infected.
If a person comes running at you screaming... Take them down. Regardless if they are a zombie or not, if you see some one eating another person or beating another person to.... you know what I'm skipping this Infected part. If you see some one being a general monster. TAKE THEM OUT!
Part 2; The Walking Undead.
If you see some one walking forward saying... BRAINS!
If you see some one eating some one else.
If you see a huge crowd of shuffling, groaning violent people take them down! (They might be emo, but no harm to fowl!)


#2. You can't be a zombie hunter if!
You can't walk faster then a shuffle.
Your a slut. (Rule from Vampire Hunting still stands)
You have a weak Stomach.
You can't be a zombie. Even more so then with the vampire.

#3. How to do it. (The Infected)
See the reason i have little respect for "The Infected" is because there just contagious humans.
So basically just shoot them, call the cops, the military, just were a face mask.

#3. How to do it. (The Walking Undead)
Well first off, you don't half to "Kill them" just get away.
A: Take them down: Just shoot for the legs and or upper chest.
B: Take them out: Aim for the head, or neck a decapitated zombie is not much of a threat.

The tools.
Long Range:
Hunting Rifles. (Great if your a OK shot, and really not hard targets.
Machine Guns. (Great for crowd control)
Mines. (Don't even half to be there for them to work, but there a little indiscriminate)
Explosive Traps. (Same as above, but easier to make!)

Medium Range.
Any Rifle. (I suggest leaver action for better reliability, and for the fun noise they make!)
Assault Rifle. (Kind of Ammunition ineffective)
Shot guns! (Loaded with Slugs, and a scope)
Bow/Crossbows. (Always fun, and much quieter)

Short Range.
Assault Rifle. (Much better at this range)
SMG. (One of the best in close weapons)
Pistol. (Just like SMG just a little smaller and less fire power)
Shotgun. (The best enclose weapon ever!)

To Close!
Pistol. (See Above)
Shotgun. (See Above)
Blunt weapons. (Something big enough to crush a skull)
Cutting Weapons. (Something big enough to take off a head or arm, i vote for Machete!)
Hacking/Puncturing Weapons. (A pick axe or axe is a bad chose to much recoil and they might get stuck)

Just for fun!
A CAR! I mean why the hell not! Or if you can get some, heavy construction equipment! Steamroller + Zombies = PARTY!